When I was
nine years old my father told me, “Pete as you grow up you’re gonna find people
will really like you or outright hate you. It’s not your fault but you’ve got a
strong personality and that’s how people react to a person like you.” Of course
to be totally honest my father also once told me, “Pete you can be very nice or
very smart in life. If I were you I’d start workin’ on that nice thing right
away.” The only other advice I can ever remember my dad giving me was, “If you
don’t know what sex it is, don’t bring it home and try to sleep with it.”
(Thanks dad. Now let’s finish our discussion on nuclear physics)
Looking back I now realize he himself
probably wanted to put me in a burlap sack and toss me in whatever nearby body
of water was deep enough to put ME out of HIS misery. Not that he didn’t like
me, but I’m sure whatever I said just prior to his delivering that ominous
warning was as aggravating as the neighbor demanding to borrow money to fix the
lawnmower he borrowed from you!
All this came to mind recently when I watched
the NBC Today Show and saw a panel of
three women broadcasters and Al Rocker discussing popularity, and if it helps
you get ahead in life. All three women immediately related the issue to how
popular they were in school and what clique they hung out in. In their own ego
encrusted frontal lobes they instantly forgot about the viewing audience and talked
about their favorite subject in the entire universe…THEMSELVES! (big surprise)
Roker on the other hand actually addressed the subject matter. The trouble is
these people can’t distinguish popularity from success. In their own
pre-pubescent, eternally sorority, minds they see popularity as an achievement
and not what it truly is a shallow, surface social distinction. More so, these
people don’t get it that popular doesn’t equal likeable.
Why would any of this matter to anyone other
than a politician or a child seeking parental approval? Because as any Octomom,
Kardashian, or Honey Boo Boo stage-mother can attest to. Andy Warhol’s fifteen
minutes of fame prediction has come to fruition as the dumbing down of society
has left us surrounded by ever present social media non-talents that should be nowhere
near any type of working video equipment.
That’s one of the major problems with today’s
media, especially TV. They consistently hire young, good looking people fresh
out of college with as much life experience as you can engrave on the head of a
pin. The media repeatedly tells us the American people are obsessed with
celebrity but in fact it’s the inexperienced TV producers who get all their news
from TMZ or Entertainment Tonight that feed us this steady diet of gossip as if
we’re fifteen year olds at a slumber party.
Researchers now claim a high IQ may allow you
to breeze through Harvard but doesn’t guarantee success in life. A high CQ (creative
quotient) will allow you to be creative in numerous fields but in no way mean
you’ll be able to find happiness. But a person with a high Q rating (general likeability
and trustworthiness) is the most likely to find the rare balance between success
in work and a home life. The point is popularity is notoriety not likeability.
Years ago I visited the Friars Club in New
York. It’s a throwback to the old days frequented by comedians, and comedic
actors. I saw three of my favorite old time comics, all in their sixties all
gray haired, all well dressed, and all big names. They were each accompanied by
a bleach blonde, thirty something wife in a tight short shirt and revealing
blouse. I was actually embarrassed for them. These women normally wouldn’t
cross the street to piss on them if their hair was on fire, but because of
their money and celebrity they married them. I dated a woman once that actually
bragged “I used to be arm candy.” I thought to myself ‘It looks more like you
use to eat candy’. I also thought ‘Sure but that was ten years and twenty
pounds ago’. The point is, who should be more ashamed; the woman who marries
for money or the guy that uses his celebrity for sex and fake love? Neither
party accepts the reality that they’re just using each other. They live with a
600 pound gorilla called denial in their subconscious.
I’m an acquired taste, like cheap wine, or
that gummy Asian food that makes you gag at first. I accept the certainty that
most people don’t like me. They merely tolerate me. I’m best in small dosages.
Spending any considerable time with me could make a Quaker want to kick my _ss.
I also realize that if I’m a nice person
with good intention maybe, just maybe I won’t be so distasteful to people in
the future.
